Wednesday, 5 November 2008

LAST REGRET


Yuvi had lost his patience by now. He took a long, hard look at the shopping list in his hand. This was his third visit to the ‘shaving kit and accessories’ section in the past 20 minutes. The pretty young thing managing the section was beginning to look at him suspiciously, probably thinking he was trying to act fresh with her. Unfortunately for him, she was quite pretty. The last two times he had visited this section, he had dared to smile sheepishly at her. She did reluctantly return the gesture then, but this time she certainly didn’t look the least amused. This time, he swore he saw her lips whisper “idiot”. He certainly did feel like one. In his mind, he cursed his roomies.

Hostel shopping lists are usually like that – without a head or a tail, totally unorganized, with just names of roomies and lists of objects of desire (read shopping items) under the names. No one really cared about organizing the list. All they were concerned with was getting their names and items on paper. Planning the mission was the headache of the person who was doing the shopping. This week’s misfortune fell on Yuvi’s head – it was his turn to do the shopping this week, for himself and 4 other roomies. He had unwittingly decided to follow the list name-wise, meaning that he’d finish Ashu’s list first, then Tarun’s, followed by Abby’s, Shiva’s, and then his own. He was on Abby’s list now, and since Abby had asked for razors and shaving foam, just like Ashu and Tarun did, he was visiting this section of the store for a third time. Now that good sense finally hit him, he checked Shiva’s list to see if he needed the same. A scan of the list revealed that he didn’t. Yuvi swore under his breath again.

Quickly picking up the needful and walking away from this section, he saw a face that looked quite familiar from a distance. She was standing at the billing counter. Her face was sweet. Her skin was smooth and dusky, and without any blemish. Her fringed hair fell beautifully over her face, and though they covered the eyes, the long eyelashes crept out from underneath. Her lips were plump and as pink as a rose. His heart skipped a beat. He tried his best to walk towards her without letting her notice. He got close enough to have a better look of her face, just to make sure it was her. He stopped in his tracks. It was Khushboo alright. Their past flashed right in front of his eyes.

He remembered how they met on the first day of college, both being victims of ragging. She had to sing while he danced. She had done a decent job, he didn’t. The raggers had hated her performance, but they loved his. Raggers somehow love things that make them laugh, he had learnt then. Anyway, after the performance, he and Khushboo realized they were in the same class. They sat on the same bench that day, and thereafter too. They attended lectures together, bunked together, visited the cafeteria together, did their assignments together.

And then one fine day both magically decided that they wanted to spend their lives together as well. The whole college knew that they were inseparable. Even their parents had a doubt. Yuvi’s roomies never let him sleep at night. They kept pestering and teasing him about her. But he was happy. So was she. The good thing was that their academics were never affected. Both did quite well. Both wanted to be Software Engineers, and both were on the right track. Everything was going good and steady.

But like they say, all good things come to an end. The end came here too, and it was quite bitter. In the last year of their degree course, they weren’t able to spend enough time with each other. Both felt themselves being neglected. Words like “Love ya baby” and “Lets go out” were replaced by “You could’ve called first”, “Why should I always be the one to wish you first?”, “Is it only you who can be busy?”, and the likes. The cracks developed slowly but surely. It was there for everyone to see. Barely a month before their final examination, they broke off. They refused to even look each other in the face, leave alone call or SMS each other. But like most lovers, Yuvi couldn’t accept the fact that he had broken-off with his love of 3 years so easily. He pined for her to come back. He missed the moments they had spent together. But no, he never tried to go up and try speaking to her, or sort out matters. A whole lot of ego, yes, but another reason was that he wanted to make sure that she missed him too. He wanted her to make the first move. But she didn’t make the first move. Neither did he.

This was almost a year ago. And here she was right now, just a few feet away from him. He felt his heart was beating fast as he wondered whether he should speak to her. “Will she respond? Will she talk to me? Will she be happy?.” A million thoughts rushed to his head like waves during high tide. Finally deciding to strike a conversation, or atleast make his presence known, he tiptoed towards the billing counter.

He positioned himself a metre away from her, right in front of her face, hoping she’d notice.

She turned towards him.

He let out a faint smile, saying nothing.

She stared at him for a few seconds.

The look was one of shock, he sensed.

And then, she looked through him, pretending as if she didn’t notice. She paid her bill, and without turning back, she walked away.

And he was heartbroken again. For the next couple of weeks at least. And then he moved on.

He regretted trying to speak to her and vowed never to do it again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ever wondered how strange it is that you and a significant other were once strangers…and then you met, became part of each others’ lives…and then one day you part ways and are strangers again..strangers meet to become one, and then break apart to become strangers again? And sometimes you’re reluctant to try making things better, but when you finally try, you’re left with a bitter taste in your mouth, and regret ever having tried!

68 comments:

  1. Very nicely written,Can really relate to it..

    We,very conveniently,make someone our everything and when they are gone,we have just memories and moments which can never come back.

    ---Keep Writing---

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  2. Beautiful story Chris!..

    Strangers meet us to become one.. but not all... there might as well be some one, who is meant to change the meaning of the entire thing.. :)..

    you can always wait for the right time.. :)..

    Loved the story...

    :)

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  3. Ever wondered how strange it is that you and a significant other were once strangers…and then you met, became part of each others’ lives…and then one day you part ways and are strangers again..strangers meet to become one, and then break apart to become strangers again? And sometimes you’re reluctant to try making things better, but when you finally try, you’re left with a bitter taste in your mouth, and regret ever having tried!


    Absolutely loved these lines! It is weird but I remember this one forward I received. Some people are in your life for a reason, some for a season and some for a lifetime. Strangers come into our lives and some become a part of our and some walk out. It hurts but life moves on.

    I, personally, dont understand the concept of being friends after a break up. Strangers is best to be especially when it still hurts..

    As for your writing, WELCOME BACK :) I hope you write more of it in the coming days...

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  4. Goood .............

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  5. hey so u back again? :)
    nicely written..dont know how many of today's youngsters have not had this experience.. I think staying away from home for years together sure does bring people closer than they otherwise would be.. n then bestows each one of us with such experiences..
    nice post.

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  6. heyaz!!!
    beautiful post..well written..
    but sumthin inside me says that perhaps it is not a story..is it an incident?a real one??

    well..people come..become special..irresistibly desired..and then they just leave..happens..
    but then one needs to move on..
    here,i wud like to pen down a MSG..dnt remember who sent it..but was sent wen neeeded..it says
    "if you have walked out of a relationship..don't worry...its all because of your future partners' prayers..:P"

    so be happy..be +ve
    hav fun
    cheerz!!

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  7. Hey Brother! Missed you (and I mean it!) Now that you are back, a well written story! The narrative went well, at a good pace. That's a beautiful thought...strangers become known only to become strangers again. But may be it's because, we have to meet one more stranger who will become the most important part of our life in future! Well said! Keep up the good work brother...planning a sequel for this one? :)

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  8. very well written..made a good read as well..the pace of the story dosen't let u stop newhere..makes u more curious 2 see what's next..liked it too much.. :)

    love is any relationship is very delicate..& these things happen when we r unable to manage other stresses or problems that affect our life..or start taking our loved one for granted..

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  9. Two strangers who meet and become amazing friends, only to let it all fall apart because of something stupid and then they meet again. You know, its weird because you know you cant have what you had back then but you still want it enyways and you try one last time, and it doesnt work out. it hurts big time and that person is like etched in the realms of your heart, it only your choice how you think of that person.
    the joy and the happiness he bought in your life or the betrayal. its better to remember the good, its good for the heart that way.
    Really good post.

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  10. Nicely written, but if I were Yuvi, I'd seriously try patching up again.. after all, it's a small world and a short life.. why do we have to make enemies or continue hatred?

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  11. hey CRD u really rock! This was indeed a wonderful story.

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  12. Hey Christopher,
    This write-up of yours is really good. I think you should be the next Chetan Bhagat.

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  13. brought back lotsa memories and other emos... damn man, i cant stop thinking about my past after reading this..

    a gr8 story which happens 2 all,..

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  14. @disha - well i guess everyone can relate to it, maybe even remotely :)
    seems uve have ghosts from the past too. :) thnx for the comments dear

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  15. @Alisha - hmm. hope its true. tired of waiting u see :P
    thnx dear:)

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  16. @Rashi - hey! i received that fwd too. twice! deleted neither of them :P
    arre actually i'm not able to blog at all nowadays. got to do it only bcoz i stayed home for 2 days, bcoz of my toe
    Thnx gal!

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  17. @Sudha - HEy, I hope im back. Managed to post only thanx to my 2 day stay at home. I really hope i find more time.Hmm yea, thts true. everyone mustve had a similar experience :)

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  18. @Nikkita - Thanx Gal..na re. not an incident..not from my life, though i must admit the feelin in the guys head might be mine :P
    Nice message. Definitely made me feel positive :d

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  19. @Tara - hey thanx sis..
    nahi yaar. no sequel to this one...not unless something good happens to Yuvi :P

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  20. @Suhani - Hey. Thanx for visiting dear :)
    Very true what u said..A lot of relationships in todays times dont last long for this very reason.

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  21. @Bluebutterfly - hey thanx yaar
    actually what u said is partially true.
    the problem with remembering the good of an estranged person is that u keep longing for that person, and can never move on...its sad but true, dont u think? :)
    Cheers

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  22. @Kalidas - Well yeah, I think some people would've tried their best to patch up. Maybe Yuvi tried that too, albeit too late.
    And maybe Khushboo didn't wanna give it a try at all :)
    Thnx for the comment man

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  23. @Sunflower - Hey thanx yaar :)

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  24. @Binda - Hey thanx buddy...Chetan Bhagat? Me? Nahi Yaar :P

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  25. @If-So-Guy - :) Thanx dude. Hope u have better memories ahead of you :)

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  26. hey i ve updated come check it out...before u miss it again!!!:P

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  27. Thats really thought provoking... kinda depressing you know... but again well written! :)

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  28. amazingly written...
    beautifully scripted...
    and just greatly thought..

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  29. kya hogya???!!!
    :( i dun like such stories anymore.. but it was a nice read.

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  30. what is with your posts and superwonderful relating? It's these mundane times when you come across someone you thought you'd never have to face again suddenly crosses paths and you're left tongue-tied.
    Thank God for bloggers like you.

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  31. :) gr8 work! hmm.. this kind of incident.. i think it could ve happened to ne1.. reader can connect himself to it.. good work!

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  32. Hi!

    Nicely done. I so hate break-ups and good-byes.
    Loved it!

    Good job!


    Mehreen.

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  33. it was wonderfully written, and yet, don't Chris. They make me want to cry, and wonder if that's what's gonna happen to me a few yrs down the line. I never ever wish this for anyone.

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  34. @nikkita - okay! coming! [:)]

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  35. @shruti - hey thanx:) it was scripted in sanity u see [:P]
    a lil bit of personal feelings set in an imaginative situation :)

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  36. @ssnab - arre kuch nahi hua yaar..aise hi had a feeling..wove a story around it..

    i guess it makes ppl whove experienced something similar cringe :) cant blame u. thx gal

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  37. @hellbound - hehe.hnx!
    nahi yaar, its not tht difficult, if uve had strong feelings and experience something that made u sad..just wove an imaginary story around a feeling :) try it yourself some day. :)

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  38. @matangi - yea dear. i think anyone can relate to it. :) thnx :)

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  39. @mehreen - hey! thanx for visiting dear. nice to have a reader from across the border :) will chk out ur blog soon :)

    Cheers

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  40. @marj - gal..its a harsh reality all of us ought to accept. we cant run away from reality, can we?
    btw, i think u havent given me some good news..no? [:P]

    we need to talk :P
    Cheers

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  41. good post...
    we all can relate to it..

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  42. hhmmm i completely understand wat u mean...
    but it's easier said than done u know..
    great work...i cud picture it all happening! keep writing :)

    n ty for the comments on my blog :)

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  43. Amazing n so real..
    It happens vid so many ppl in life.. Once v r so close n later do not even recognise..
    Very nice Languge..

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  44. thats one thing i want to always manage to do : to smile at every one even if we had hell lots differences ..

    a well written post ,,, specially the start :)

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  45. Brilliant writin crissy, Reading posts after a loong tym. The story to me is somewat real, in the sense m sure we all myt have experienced something like this.

    It is not a bad thing to try and patch things up, but if its ever going to make u feel bad ever, i think its better u dnt do it. And one thing I personally feel is, if u broke up as friends and patch up again, its very difficult to get the feeling bak if u know wat i mean.

    So yeah then again this depends on every individual.

    Coming bak to the post, I really liked it a lot, lil to harsh in the end may be its the anger and regret but yeah its totaly acceptable.

    Way to go dear.

    Good Post

    Love
    Tee

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  46. ......"Ever wondered------------ and regret ever having tried!".....

    I guess, the most striking aspect of your story happen to be these last few lines.
    Something like the last splutter of the candle flame prior to getting extinguished, and plunging the room into darkness. Despite the stark darkness, the image remains seared into your memory for quite some time.

    Apart from that gleam, the narrative had a strong whiff of being autobiographical.

    If you want to take it to a level of the truly exceptional from a mundane one; one which stays with you, much after you have logged off, then increase the complexities in the narrative.

    The meeting and falling apart of the two, was way too clichéd. The reason to fall apart was too flimsy, especially if they happened to go around together for three years.

    The aspect of the ego, preventing one from rapprochement was well covered.


    Well, that’s my take on your effort.[:)]
    I happen to see from your blog that you have posted prolifically; though I did not happen to read any more.
    Keep on writing and post more. [:)]
    Satyajeet.

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  47. hmm i read this story of urs....a few weeks back but ws unable to comment....
    neways..m doing it now....

    Its about something which i cn easily relate to,,,,it happens so often in life....
    Friends fall apart on petty issues...and the "ego" comes in the way of patching up.....
    if one just summons the courage to call a frnd for just once...m pretty sure all miunderstandings cn be cleared....
    The only condition is...the frndship must be true..

    i hv often noticed....in our relations we are sometimes searching for something to make an excuse for break up....such relations never last.....and in ur story it seems that both were doing the same thing...


    Neways....
    a superb effort....

    i cn foresee tht one day i will be reading chistopher's collection of short stories :)

    Keep writing....

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  48. Well, Chris, I don't really know why the story goes like it goes, but as a former dexter (in my opinion, of course), I can sense that you have written the story quite dexterely. The language is very accurateand simple. Great writers write like that. But even among great writers there are a few who manage to keep the stuff alluring. This is the only thing you may improve with in your story. For rest, "nothing in this world is perfect" and me and you are parts of this world yaar. Great work, I'd say.

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  49. u kn wht dude...such things happen ...i have read many stories in similar lines....n ice work ...stranged once....get closer and then again strangers after separation ......

    last few lines that u mentioned were true...nice work

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  50. nice story :)

    u know something? I believe, that what ever happens, happens for a 'good reason' trust me... even if one goes through a break up, I personally feel that there is a good reason for it! God must have taught u some lesson from that relationship followed by the break up...

    right things happen at the right time... sometimes we must leave things in God's hands :)

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  51. @misty - well yeah, easier said than done it sure is! :)
    Thanx...and You're Welcome :)

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  52. @Pretty - yea, i see that u always smile, no matter what. I can't do that. My emotions betray me :P

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  53. @Tina - Thnx gal. loved your comment a lot :)

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  54. @Satyajeet - Wow dude..that was a really poetic comment. :) Thanx for the suggestions. WIll keep them in mind the next time :)

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  55. @Eisha - Chris's collection of short Stories?? :) Amen to that :) Thnx gal :)

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  56. @Anurag - Thanks a lot mate. :)

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  57. @Prajwala - I don't quite believe in destiny. On the other hand, I think everything that happens today is the direct consequence of what happened in the past.

    For example: Im replying to comments right now. So something will happen 2 hours hence. If I wasn't replying to comments right now, that something which was gonna happen 2 hours hence would be a lil different than wat would happen in the first case

    Okay, before u get put off, lemme stop :P

    Thanx gal :)

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  58. well written , in love and friendship there should be no egos thats what wrecks all relationships.
    A good read enjoyed it.

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