Sunday 2 September 2012

BLAME IT ON THE DARK

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 31; the thirty-first edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. The theme for this month is 'Strangers in the Night'

Dark was the night and weird the atmosphere. It rained from time to time. Gusts of wind shook the nearby forest. Between thunderclaps and the moaning of jackals could be heard the eerie laughter of spirits. But King Vikramaditya held his nerve. Braving extreme fatigue and a throbbing headache, he walked towards the ancient tree once again. It was pitch dark, and he could barely see his own nose in whatever little light the moon could afford. Nevertheless, after struggling for more than ten minutes, he climbed the tree and reached out for the corpse that hung from it. Ignoring the corpse's violent protests, he brought it down. In keeping with the usual routine, he flung it over his shoulders and walked towards the cremation ground for the umpteenth time.

However, as soon as he began crossing the desolate cremation ground, the spirit that possessed the corpse said, "Pardon me, I have a really sore throat, so you're gonna have to pay a little extra attention tonight. I'm sure I've said this to you a million times already, but I can't understand what your aim is. What do you seek from me? It is pitch dark, and you & I can barely see anything. Aren't you afraid of the dark?"

The King merely shook his head in a horizontal motion to indicate that he wasn't, careful not to break his vow of silence. He kept walking.

"I don't intend to be rude, but your back smells like shit. When was the last time you had a bath? You seriously need to gome home."

The King was tempted to say 'My back smells like crap coz it's you who's been piggybacking me a million times.' But he kept mum.

The spirit continued, "Alright, without further ado, let's get back to business shall we?", in a tone that sounded like he was teasing the King.

The King nodded in the affirmative. 

"Very well then. Adinath from Maynagadh had seven livestock animals - three goats and the rest cows. He had a policy of milking only one animal per day. In a week's timeframe, what is the probability of Adinath having milked a goat? If you know the answer and still keep mum, your head will be blown into a thousand pieces."

The King was annoyed. He thundered back, "Hey, time out mister! This ain't fair! You're not supposed to ask me mathematics and statistics-based questions! And where's the story?"

The corpse was stunned. He leaned over the King's shoulder to take a look at his face.

Their eyes met for the first time.

"Which tree?", the corpse asked in an irritable tone.

The King smiled sheepishly, visibly embarassed at his faux pas. "Tree no. 43C - Moral Science."

"That's about a dozen trees from mine.I'm from 39A - Statistics"

An awkward silence dwelt over the strangers in the night thereafter, as the King carried the corpse back to its creepy abode.

Picture and background of the main write-up thanks to Chandamama Comics - www.chandamama.com
The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. I've participated in 3 editions so far.

48 comments:

  1. CRD,

    First of all, Apologies for missing to update your link :( I somehow forgot amidst the chaos I went through last night :(

    Coming to the story, beautifully humorously scripted by you. I loved the way you differentiated the voices using colour coding. Great writing.. Good luck for BAT.

    Someone is Special

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    Replies
    1. No problem mate. All's well that ends well ;)

      Glad you liked it. ATB to u too

      Delete
  2. Believe me I was thinking of Vikramaditya as a nice plot to weave an excellent story and I saw yours. Really superb spoof twisted.
    Engrossing read.

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    Replies
    1. Hah! I beat you to it, didn't I? :P

      Thanks

      Delete
  3. Hahaha, what a story! Scripted insanity at its best! We have a winner here for sure. It is posts like this that make me enjoy Blogaton so much. All the best!

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    Replies
    1. Well, I win only if you vote for me :P So please do the needful ;)

      Cheers
      CRD

      Delete
  4. Man. This is unbelievable. You just rock! Expected no less from you.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks a lot :) Will read your entry soon

      Delete
  5. No, you can't end the story if I am still in shock!

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    Replies
    1. Hope you're better already!

      Had to end somewhere :P

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  6. Brilliant post! What an ending! Its been so long since I heard/saw any Vikram/Betal stories but this was truly unbelievable! You now make your way into my reading list, glad I found this blog!

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    1. Thanks for the compliment :) Glad you liked it

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  7. amazing write...roll backs the time...when i used to read all of it as a child :)
    ATB for BAT :)
    i could not participate...but u can see my post here
    Karan - Strangers in the Night

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hey the above link is broken
      u can see my post here
      Karan - Strangers in the Night

      Delete
    2. Aaah...I almost missed it myself. Better luck next time mate. Will surely read your post

      Delete
  8. Wow! CRD! That was a twist to end all twists :)

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    Replies
    1. Hehe. Nice comment CS. Will read your entry soon

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  9. he he ... what a spoof... gr8 ending

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  10. Awesome +1, is the word!! ;O Last time in BAT your take was so funny as well!!

    Do stop by my blog! Kappu

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    Replies
    1. Thanks :) Will surely visit yours soon :)

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  11. Hahaa....you took me back to my childhood days with chandamama...:))
    Stupendous story and deliciously narrated! Loved this!

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  12. Very different take on the topic and Whoa....What a question from the betal! :) Reminded me of Vikram and Bethaal Television serial....I used to get scared of that white thing as a child! :)

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    Replies
    1. You were scared of Betaal? You serious? :P

      Thanks for the comment :)

      Delete
    2. Yeah I was a little girl then and that white skinned( I mean literally white ) thing used to freak me out a little :) do read my entry for the blogaton if possible. Would love to hear ur feedback :)

      Delete
  13. I remember the time when Mom used to narrate the story to me. The phrase fits here perfectly :)

    ❤Not Just My Allegories❤

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  14. I feel so foolish here.

    Ok - I cam to your post a couple of days ago. I read a bit, and though 'what the hell is this'.. and decided to come back later. I am left with just a few more posts to read, so I came back today.

    I realized I needed some Vikram-Betaal background for this one. So, I did some wiki and got the very basic idea (even though am a desi Indian, I never watched the serial... god knows why). In fact, I have just written in my to-do that I need to watch/read about it.

    Back to your post - so, I read it once, twice, thrice... and I still can't make sense of it. Absolutely no sense. And I would love it for you to tell me what exactly is happening. I get totally knocked down when the reference to Tree 43 C comes.

    People have been leaving nice comments about the post. Please - I dont want to miss the fun. Help.

    -Ignorant Person

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ohh!! Wait a minute. Just when I pressed Submit, something struck. He picked the wrong spirit? Eh??

      Delete
    2. Aha! The wonders of technology! Thank you submit button!! :P

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    3. Yes! Sorry for the dumbass behvior buddy.

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    4. Relax mate. Was just kidding. Cheers to you! Keep visiting

      Delete
  15. I loved the comedy of error at the end. I was just wondering, was that corpse expecting someone? Perhaps not vikramaditya but someone else. Nice work :-)

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    1. On the contrary, it was Vikram who pickd up the wrong guy. Thanks :)

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  16. hahaha... Now that's some good weird humor. Thanks for putting up that link on my page.

    I enjoyed the read. :)

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    Replies
    1. Thanks...For the compliment and for following :)

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  17. nice blog. Following you. :)

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  18. Seriously like I had to read it twice or may be thrice and also all of your comments just to verify what I understood was what you wanted to convey !!!
    And I am laughing like crazy now Hahahaha!!! Its a great work of writing and I absolutely loved it.:)

    you know I also wanted to thank you for voting for me in the previous BAT:) I some how missed to read your entry last time!

    following you too :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you liked it.

      No need to thank me. I simply voted for the entries I thought deserved votes. And I'm sure your votes went to those who deserved them

      Cheers
      CRD

      Delete
  19. Read it twice to understand :-P

    And, when I did, it was ROFL for ten minutes straight ! :-D

    Brilliant post :)

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    1. Thanks a lot. And thanks for the vote as well :)

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  20. Nostalgic with Vikram aditya episodes...Thank you for bringing back those memories!

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    1. Thanks for the comment...and for your vote :)

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  21. Good read. Kudos for reminding us all about our childhood story books :D

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  22. Hahahaa... well crafted Bro!
    I'm glad to visit your space after a long time CRD... hope you're rocking...
    Keep penning... & take care.

    ReplyDelete

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