Friday 18 September 2009

BACK TO SQUARE ONE...


Its back to where it all began once again. I feel the same uneasy feeling I had during the first few weeks since I first met them.

I feel like a stranger in their midst.

Even if there's a conversation happening, I feel completely left out. That vibe and connection that was so strong only a few weeks ago has suddenly vanished.

If I have something to say, they don't seem to be listening.

They don't tag me along for tea anymore, and if I ask them, they keep me waiting.

My jokes aint funny anymore..I really miss their guffaws. They only laugh when I say something serious nowadays.

Some of them always have something nasty to say about me...I guess I'm to blame...I've been too much of a clown. No one takes me seriously anymore.

Its back to where it all started. I can't be my usual self till I'm sure that I'm accepted. That sense of belonging has faded a wee bit.

The sad thing is that in a few months, we will all go on to separate paths. Maybe we'll never see each other again.

Sometimes I remember those happy times we shared, and think how lucky I've been. At other times, I wonder why I always break the vow I made to myself a little more than a year ago - a vow not to make friends or emotional attachments ever again.

Is this why they say "Familiarity breeds contempt" ?

10 comments:

  1. hmm..dont worry!
    things gonna be alright!
    *actually..I really dont know what iam talkin here..dont worry..i am used to it.

    __

    its jsut that we are confused..all you need is redbull

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  2. cris dude, whtssup wid u? r u serious or this is just another blog? chinta na karo...sab changa hoyega :D :D

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  3. sorceror - man! that was bull....redbull!!

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  4. @adeline - there you go...another serious thing you can laff about!!

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  5. Some times we experience a sudden change in our personality, people who once we were close to and could relate to easily now we no find comfortable to be around.Its a thing called growing up , maturity, some times we have to accept that people change at different levels and speed.Maybe you have grown apart from your so called friends sooner than you wanted , sometimes we make friends and keep them for life others we fade away from them after a while Maybe its time to spread your wings and move on. make new friends and lay foundations for new relationships.

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  6. I agree with angel from heaven..
    New friends ARE sometimes better than old ones.. :)

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  7. Why so serious?
    Chill man. Shit happens all the time.

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  8. wonder why such shit happens ... people who are familiar with you ..... have known you for a long time ... shouldnt make u feel like dis !! but i guess angel from heaven is right ... wen you're no more comfortable in old associations ... its time to move on !!

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  9. If that's the way they react, u cant change it. If this is who you are, and u like making people laugh occasionally, the mature ones will know not to guffaw every fkin time.
    Ignore, delete, repeat ohkie chrisyy. Works for me, should work for u too. And if u miss them, u cna have imaginary freind in your head. They're the best really :D

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  10. Well we all change with time and age as does friendships.we move on and make new friends thats life.

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